Friday, March 17, 2006

Taking a Dump Truck

My Family Crest I would wager that you, the reader, thought that the Mooser Extravaganza had come to a close. Oh no. Fate has deemed this story worthy of a trilogy. Unfortunately, there doesn't seem to be any Ewok celebration in sight.

Mooser and I were driving down the highway the other day, and out of the bed of an uncovered dump truck a cruel rock of windshield spite came tumbling down the highway. It hopped with tangible glee at the no-doubt unavoidable rendezvous with Mooser's windshield. We swerved and lurched in a fruitless attempt to avoid the splenetic stone. But with every course alteration, the moose-seeking marble seemed to slightly correct its attack vector on the next bounce, until it delivered its stinging kiss.

Swearwords will not suffice. I need swearsentences.

As the crack completely encompassed my line of vision, we needed to replace Mooser's entire windshield to stay street-legal. The windshield replacement technician only suffered three comminuted fractures at the hooves of Mooser in the reparation process. And, as they say, three out of four broken limbs ain't bad.

With the recovery out of the way, only vengeance could follow. So, Mooser and I began our campaign of Dump Truck Windshield Penance. We visited no less than 40 strip mines, quarries and tipper truck car washes in our breaklust, and by the end, I believe that we ousted our anger demons. Although Mooser wasn't contented until he donkey kicked over a few ice cream trucks as well.
Long Haul
Can you hear me now?

Let that be a lesson to all negligent dump truck operators. Cover your beds or be covered in lacerations.
Prologue | Previous | Next | Current

2 Discourse(s):

Blogger Draing declared...

This is what you post on St. Patrick's Day? Somebody needs a cement mixer.

7:44 AM  
Blogger Eemos declared...

Actually, there was one of those in the last quarry Mooser and I had visited. As I had no quarrel with it, I just let it be.

...although now that you mention it, the bulldozer, crane, backhoe and frontloader accompanying the cement truck seemed to be conspiring...

5:05 AM  

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